I Hate Aero Helmets

So racing my first on-road triathlon of the year the other day reminded me of several things I really dislike about road triathlon.  Today I will address my biggest annoyance, the aerodynamic cranial protector.

If you think you look cool, you’re wrong. You look like this guy.

Although clearly “faster” than a traditional cycling helmet, any gains are not worth the losses in safety, but most importantly fashion.  Simply put, you look like an idiot while wearing an aero helmet and you can’t hear a damn thing.  I haven’t met anyone that would argue that the aero helmet is stupid.  In fact, almost everyone I know travels to races with both a traditional helmet and an aero helmet for racing.  I haven’t conducted an official poll, but I would assume that most would rather just travel across the country with only one cranial protector packed away in their luggage.  Set aside those who carry-on the “high-tech” race device and lug it all around the airport in hopes on encouraging others to talk to them about how many Ironmans they have done, monster brick workouts, M-dot tattoos, water-temps, and compression socks.

M-dot gear missing from view…

In discussing the ridiculousness of the aero helmet with my wife, she reminded me of one instance in which the aero helmet is permissible.  That is when you are the Time Trial National Champion of the United States of America and use the opportunity to fashion your national champion race kit into the costume of a super hero.  Under these circumstances, and these alone, donning a race helmet that looks suitable but not capable of space travel is appropriate.

The exception wording would have to be very specific.

In light of these undisputed facts, I recommend that only traditional cycling helmet be allowed for all forms of triathlon.  The seasoned triathlon fan will know that Draft-legal Olympic triathlon has already abandoned the aero helmet in favor of fashion and function.  Don’t we want to be more like our Olympic superstars?  I say it’s time we turn the tables on roadies and point and laugh at them as they do their time trial events with these ridiculous appendages on their heads.

This is what a shot of the age group race should look like in KONA, everyone drafts there anyway.

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